


Cloister Bells

by Vanessa_Cocotea



Category: Doctor Who: Eighth Doctor Adventures - Various Authors
Genre: Gen, Humor, Improv, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-17
Updated: 2013-07-17
Packaged: 2017-12-20 11:28:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/886724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vanessa_Cocotea/pseuds/Vanessa_Cocotea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From 2007: </p><p>Just a bit of chilly nonsense for all those across the planet suffering from various heatwaves - including my family, to remind us, heatwaves don't last forever.</p><p>I was bored and got very silly. Eight, Santa and a hare...and rum...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cloister Bells

Dashing through the vortex, in a battered old type-forty  
Blown by the time-winds we go, feeling clearly dotty;  
Lights on the console blink, making spirits freak;  
O what dread t'will be to give the doors an op'ning tweak!

Oh! Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!  
Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!

A hour or two ago, I found I'd should take a ride  
And see my old friend, Nick, now standing by my side;  
The elves went mad and left, misfortune seemed his lot;  
He got into a major huff and Christmas got upsot.

Oh! Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!  
Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!

My green velvet coat I shed, to help whate'er way I could.  
Nick looked at me askance, then asked me if I would;  
Help him to catch a hare, who'd run completely all amok;  
I said that I would do, if we could have some true blue luck.

Oh! Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!  
Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!

How the hare had got inside, remained a mystery;  
For rum had made Santa Claus as drunk as he could be.  
I grabbed a wet towel from the loo and as the hare did pass,  
I gave a mighty fling did I and snapped him on the ass!

Oh! Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!  
Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!

The hare he jumped sky-high, then took off at great speed.  
No Santa could I find, but him I would sorely need.  
Then I heard the strangest sound, so followed it did I  
And saw a sight that made me laugh, as Santa he did cry,

Oh! Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! Rabbits in the grass.  
Now I've caught that bloody hare, he'll join me in a glass!  
Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! Rabbits in the grass.  
Now I've caught that bloody hare, he'll join me in a glass!

Ashamed am I to say, that Christmas morn did find  
The three of us had rum of many a pleasant kind;  
And under the Christmas tree we truly had been sunk;  
Till we three all were indeed completely and absolutely drunk!

Oh! Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!  
Cloister Bells! Cloister Bells! Bonging all the way!  
O how bizarre it is to land in Santa's place tonight!

FIN


End file.
